Bloody kids.

What is it with the young these days? When i was a teenager if i went out during the day, i would just put my shoes on, slip a jacket on and out the door. And in the evenings at weekends if i was going to the pub or somewhere simlar, it would be a quick bath or shower, comb of the hair (cos i had some then) and again out the door. Simples eh!. But now i have a family that are determined to set a world record for taking the longest time for getting ready. And they're only going to the bloody shops. My son seems to be the worst. He's nineteen and living at home with his girlfrind. I've never known anyone who can take that much time in the bathroom, spend that amount on produts, only to appear from his room looking like he's just put his finger in a plug socket. The thing is i could have saved all that time and money for him by just wiring him up to the mains, but my wife says i cant because of the cost of electricity. Which is another thing. Because of their use of hair dryers, straightners and tongs etc, our power supplier has sent us a letter thanking us for personaly pulling them out through the recession, and their share holders can now sleep soundly at night. Anyway. Why do you need straightners when your hair is already straight? is it just me or am i missing a trick here? You could just imagine the conversation in the shop.
Assistant. Hello sir could i intrest you in a set of desgner staightners?
Son. No thanks, my hair is already straight.
Assistant. Straight is it then sir?
Son. Yes i think it is.
Assistant. Only think it is sir?
Son. Why?
Assistant. Well sir you may think it's straight and neat. But here at Boots we take "straight" to another level. We have scientists working 27/7 to get that straightness you could only dream of, and the end result is this wonder tool here, and a bargain at only £200. Just think what all your friends would say when they saw how much straighter your straight hair looks.
Son. Well, as you put it like that i better take a set then.
I rest my case. See you soon